I bought a car yesterday. Actually I bought my car again yesterday. It’s a long story.
Once Upon a Time Many years ago, while still living in Illinois, I bought a car. The dealer recommended a lender and I applied for the loan there and got a very nice 5% lending rate.
When we moved from Illinois to Kansas in the summer of 2004 the license plate tag on the car was almost expired. When the new Illinois sticker came we put off going to the Kansas DMV; why stand in line unless it is absolutely necessary. In August of 2005 Michele handled the license plate sticker renewal. Looking back now I realize she must have told me about the issue with the title and the bank in Illinois and the State of Kansas, but through the fog of her death I really can’t remember.
The Issue With the Bank, the Title, and the State of Kansas The title to the vehicle is held by the lien holder, in this case the Illinois National Bank of Springfield, Illinois. The car is collateral for the loan, so they keep the title unitl it’s paid for. However, now that the car (and I) reside in Kansas, it needs a Kansas registration to go with Kansas license plates. Oddly enough, the State of Kansas would like to have a Kansas title on the vehicle. When I went to get my August 2006 sticker I discovered this fact and called the bank in Illinois to have them send an original of the title to Kansas. The bank said, “no way.”
They don’t “do” out-of-state vehicles and refused to release the title to Kansas. Fortunately I managed to connect with a very understanding representative at the Kansas Department of Revenue who gave me a 1-year exemption on the title requirement so I could get my sticker for the year. This would also give me time to transfer the loan to Kansas. Obviously this must have been the deal that Michele engineered in August of 2005 that I either never knew about or can’t now remember.
When I called the bank in Illinois to plead my case they flatly refused to release the title. Even after I pointed out that this was going to cost them business. It would appear that they take the “Illinois” in their name far too seriously.
A New Loan Last September after I sorted out the whole sticker/title/bank/Kansas mess I put a reminder on my calendar for July to transfer the loan to my credit union here. This past spring in an effort to be more organized we started a couple of goals lists, and one of my goals was to complete the loan transfer by July.
Monday this week I completed an online automobile loan application at my credit union and yesterday I went to the local branch office and signed the paperwork. It will cost me a bit more now to own the car outright, but the lender, and therefore the lien holder, is now in Kansas. Within a week or two, when the processing is complete in Illinois, my credit union will hold the original title and I can register the car in my state of residence.
So today I got to drive my “brand new” car to work.
With the help of eleven people we move most of her stuff yesterday. There is something incredible in the generosity of friends and strangers. Without the help of these people we could not have done what was accomplished yesterday. The task of loading furniture and a refrigerator, tables and boxes on to the truck would have been quite simply beyond us. And the task of unloading it all just a couple of hours drive later would have been impossible as well.
That so many people came and helped, lifted, carried, packed, and cleaned, and did so cheerfully and willingly felt wonderful. Too often in life all we hear about are the negative aspects of people, to have a day where we saw again and again the positive, the goodness in people was very special.
So to Kelly, Jamie, Chris, Allen, Yea Su, Tengung, John, Michael, Ben, and the two guys whose names I didn’t catch, I say thank you. Not just thank you for lending your muscle to our move, but thank you for displaying the strength of community, the power of good, and the joy of shared experiences. Yesterday was a very good day for us in large part do to all of you sharing it with us.
I’m permanently 72 cubic MM smaller today. Maybe 73.
As a follow-up to my physical last month I had a dermatology visit yesterday to have some moles on my back examined. There is a history of melanoma in my family, and one or two of the spots on my back were suspicious enough that my primary physician wanted the dermatologist to have a look. The appointment was one of the speedier doctor visits I’ve ever had; thirty minutes from start to finish, including 4 stitches.
There were two spots he wanted to remove, one 4x4 MM and the other 4x5 MM. The whole process took about 5 minutes, and now I’ve got two dents in my back, each roughly 2 MM deep. The stitches are to stay in for 10 days, which seems like a great long time given the size of the wounds. No shower for the first 24 hours, so I’m all itchy this morning. The spots are a bit itchy, but not really painful.
When I go back in 10 days to have the stitches removed I’ll get the pathology results. As he was leaving the treatment room the doctor said that he didn’t think these were anything to lose sleep over.
After a brief flirtation with returning to karate this past winter, a new martial art has risen to the top of our list. Returning to karate was unsatisfactory on several levels, not the least of which was the potential to aggravate my degenerative disk disease, or arthritic back. Also I wanted to find something we could potentially share.
Aikido was also considered but after a visit to the Three Dragons Way studio last evening for a complementary trial class, I think we’ve found a new shared activity. The studio itself is clean and well presented. There were about fifteen adults and several children in attendance, with the kids working in a separate space downstairs from the adults. Everyone was open and friendly, and the atmosphere was very casual. After the often rigid formality of karate-do, the barely perceptible ritual of starting class was a bit of a shock to me. Everyone seemed to be enjoying themselves and the overall atmosphere was very welcoming. Class ended with a bit more formality than it started. As my favorite part of karate-do was always the kata, practicing a new form for most of the class period was very pleasing to me.
The art itself is measured, calm, non-aggressive. I have likened Tai Chi in the past to slow motion underwater ballet. There is real power and technique hidden in those long liquid movements; hidden meanings to be discovered and learned. The 45-minute practice warmed me up nicely and did not have any deleterious effect on my lower back. We are planning on returning this evening to sign up and try it for a while.
It has been several weeks now since the doctor diagnosed my back condition as severe degenerative disk disease (read arthritis). I’ve had a physical therapy evaluation, and two follow-up PT sessions. Tomorrow I have the final follow-up session and then I am on my own.
The PT has consisted of lower back strengthening and stretching exercises. I have sixteen different activities to perform on a daily basis now, about 30 minutes worth of effort. The exercises themselves are simple to perform, they just require that I do them in order to be effective. It seems that late in the evening, towards bedtime, is the best time for me to work them into my routines.
It is hard to say what kind of impact they are having but I think they are making a difference. Over the weekend I helped pack, lift, and move several hundred pounds of books, music, and furniture with no ill effects. There are still times that my back hurts, but I haven’t had a debilitating episode since the first weekend in May.
We have been trying to walk more, trying to exercise more without much success. It is hard to insert new activities in to a routine. Harder still to accomplish that when the routine is already undergoing major changes and upheaval. In another couple of weeks the move will be largely behind us and we can start to focus on daily life again. I think we’ll be more capable of taking daily walks and perhaps attending Tai Chi classes after that milestone has been reached.
For now I am doing pretty good. I understand that my back will never be has strong or flexible as it was when I was younger, but I am hopeful that I can retard the effect of arthritis and keep the strength and flexibility I currently have.
Over the weekend we spent a fair amount of time rearranging the furniture. There were two goals in mind. First a shared desk/office space with room for various computers, printers, camera USB cords, pencils, scraps of paper, and good luck Buddha’s. Oh, and two people. Over the winter of 1992-1993 I built a wooden desk reminiscent of the teacher’s desks the public school system placed in all my childhood classrooms. By turning it ninety degrees and using a couple of TV trays as a printer stand we were able to fit all our computer stuff on the desk. She sits on one side and I the other. So far it is working out extremely well. The timeless design of the wooden teachers desk has proven to be incredibly versatile.
With our nerd needs well taken care of we turned to the rest of the apartment. We needed room for two upright pianos, each approximately five feet long. By giving away (“free to a good home”) a cheap corner desk we made room in the spare bedroom for the television and all the DVD movies. This has now become our media room. The addition of an end table and lamp makes this room very cozy and comfortable.
With the television and DVD stands out of the main room we were able to move the couch and chairs around creating a space along one wall long enough for both instruments. The wall the pianos rest against is an interior wall giving some buffer between us and the neighboring apartments. Still we may add some insulation or other sound baffle between the pianos and the wall to keep them from overpowering the space.
After two fairly active days moving furniture, vacuuming, and cleaning we were in need of some reward. Take out Chinese and a DVD in the new media room was a perfect end to a beautiful weekend.
Over the weekend we started to combine our households. The first step was introducing the cats. The initial stages have included some hissing and general tentativeness, but on the whole I think the melding is going rather well.
Nekko, the oldest cat, has spent sometime in the kennel recently and therefore is used to other cats. She has been surprisingly casual about the introduction of Bootstrap to the family. She boldly approached him and his food dish the first night and hasn’t displayed any reticence at all since then.
Taz, the 4-year old, has been out of sorts and is presently camped out on top of the kitchen cabinets. As a kitten she was part of a group of pets that visited nursing homes, and she lived in an enclosure with several other cats. However, that was all far enough in the past that she has forgotten about other cats and her reaction the past two days has been, ah, hissy. Still, I think she is slowly coming around. The hissing is from closer distances and she is out more rather than hidden today.
Bootstrap is also 4-years old, and at one time lived with other cats himself. He seems least bothered by the other two cats, but then he is also coping with a strange new home. He hasn’t been very vocal and I think I’ve only heard him hiss once in the time he’s been here.
Hopefully soon they will all be co-existing with each other peacefully.
For the last year, maybe year and a half, I have tossed my pocket change into an old tupperware bin in the kitchen junk drawer. The bin finally filled to where coins were falling out of it into the drawer itself. And the drawer was getting harder to work as the weight of the coins was causing it to bind in its tracks a bit.
So today I took them all to the credit union and made a little deposit. Before going however, I stood on the bathroom scale and weighed the coins. 13.6 pounds of them. In all I have 1682 coins: 755 pennies, 180 nickels, 326 dimes, and 421 quarters, for a total of $154.40.
A nice little bonus this month.
Next Monday will mark the one-year anniversary of my mom’s death, and for the past few days I have been acutely uncomfortable. Nothing big, or easy to put into words, just a feeling of being antsy, itchy to do something and yet too tired to move. Uncomfortable in my own skin.
At some level of consciousness I knew it was related to approaching anniversary but I didn’t want to look at that fact, or even think it for fear that it would overwhelm me. Grief has stalked me for such a long time now that I am weary of leering grin creeping into even the sunniest days and moments. However, ignoring it won’t make it go away; pushing the emotions down only causes them to come out sideways. Facing her death again, head on, is the only way to move through this emotional doldrums and on to the fresh, moving air on the other side.
Last night was the worst and I eventually dissolved in to a pile of tears. Crying was a good release and I actually felt better as a result. Again, lessons I already know but are reluctant to act upon. The tears are cathartic but exhausting. Actually what is exhausting is holding everything in, when the dam bursts and the tears come you get to relax and the exertion you’ve been under finally goes away. I slept deeply and peacefully last night and feel better today.
In the coming days I want to do somethings to acknowledge my loss and to remember Mom. Perhaps making a cheesecake they way she did. Some kind of ceremony. Memorial Day weekend indeed.
I’m late coming to the whole Podcast scene. To me it seemed like talk radio, only performed by amateurs. Recently, however, at a friends recommendation, I have started actively listening to one. My Daily Phrase: German.
I’ve been learning a word or phrase or two every day on my way to work and back. It’s basically a free language tape that I can play on my iPod. This is where the Internet, and the wealth of services and information really shines. That I can get, for free, a high quality language learning system delivered to my home is amazing.
If you haven’t explored the range of Podcasts, if you were like me and thought there is nothing there of interest, I suggest you go and look again.